October 1st has a special significance for me. It was back on October 1st, 2021, when I first seriously surrendered to Recovery from crystal meth addiction. This past October 1st marked 5 years since that decision.

Let me clear–I’m not 5 years sober. There have been short relapses in that span of time. I’m currently 46 days back from a slip. But I want to take a moment to reflect on the passage of these past 5 years. I also want to make a key point for those out there in Recovery who wrestle with relapse–it’s the time spent sober that matters. You don’t lose your time, your recovery tools, nor the lessons learned during your sober time when, or if, you relapse.

I sat down and calculated how many days I’ve been sober in the past 5 years. The relapses amounted to 53 days. The sober time totaled 1780 days. And when I get geeky and do math I was sober 97% of the time during those 5 years.

I thank my ongoing strong recovery program for that achievement. I thank CMA, the CMA fellowship, the 12 steps, and the two sponsors I’ve had during that time. My program isn’t perfect (it’s about progress not perfection). If you’ve consecutive years of clean time–I’ve had them–more power to you. This is also not the space to debate if relapse is a part of Recovery (a subject for another post) But for me, when I consider it, I can say: 1780 days of sober ain’t bad. Not bad at all. Just for today, my desire to use is lifted. If you’re sober from addiction today, you’re winning. That’s what matters. I’ll keep coming back